I learned of Hover Rider one dark and cloudy day, which was also the last day I ever saw my girlfriend of 5 years. She had just left me, you see. “It’s not working out,” she told me, without a tear in her eye. “I’ve found someone else,” she added. Naturally, I ventured to interrogate her on the nature of the man that had stolen her from me. “Hover Rider,” is all she said, before she turned around and walked away with her smart phone clutched tightly in hand. Long had this occurrence weighed on my mind. I was once without a device with which to play mobile apps, you see, and now, I had only one thing on my mind: Revenge. I steeled myself to buy a smart phone so I could download this preposterous Hover Rider and exact vengeance upon it for whisking my beloved away. But curses upon curses, did I walk right into its trap! The devious game had me right in its clutches with its addictive and challenging gameplay—the adorable, simplistic art style filled my soul with feelings of ease—the unlockable characters had me grasping at air, filled with desire—and time and time again, I would fail at the game only to retry multiple times, hoping I could beat my high score! It is not easy to say, but I have to come clean: I, too, have fallen in love with Hover Rider. What is Hover Rider? It is love. It is salvation. It is the answer to life’s problems. It has showed me the light, and I hope you see it too.