I was just about to jump off of a bridge, but right before, I remembered I had to update Pokémon Go before I did. While I was in the App Store, I decided to search something quite random before I jumped: "trombone game." This game popped up, and so I decided to play it, and it pulled me out of my spiraling depression. The thirsty trombone, the rainbow hair, the lack of instructions, the random point system, the insane graphics, that drop of water; it was all so beautiful. I knew that I could not jump to a watery grave if such joy existed in the world.
UPDATE:
I've been playing this game for the 9 years, 3 hours, 5 minutes. I've gained 420 pounds, and am addicted to not only this game, but cocaine, heroin, and the apps Curio Quest and Pancake. I have been sent into a spiraling depression once again, due to the glitch that happens after you reach the score 9,354,209,111,738: it will not let you shoot your hair at the trombone anymore, and you have to cry as you watch the trombone take the water droplet from you.It's too much to bare. I cannot live my life with this glitch. Here I stand, once again at the ledge of this. bridge, in Tallahassee, Florida, ready to jump. Goodbye, Regent vs. Trombone. . .