Oh my good gracious, folks, you will not believe the sheer capability of this technological marvel. At first, I was skeptical about the concept of an X-ray app but my doubts were shattered, almost like my innocence, upon the very first use! I mean, this app surely utilizes the absolute pinnacle of scientific advancements to turn my modest phone into an X-ray machine!
The only minuscule problem, (and I mean absolutely teeny tiny) is that it falsely represented the size of my wiener; it's much more grandiose in reality, I assure you. I even measured it with my very own custom ruler, so I am certain the app is playing tricks on me.
But aside from this obviously hilarious joke the app played on me (kudos to the developers for having a sense of humor), I am absolutely thrilled with my X-ray vision; I've been walking around, discovering the true insides of things — my couch, the fridge, my goldfish... it's like being a kid again! Oh, the wonderment this app brings is unparalleled; I highly recommend it to fellow explorers of the unknown! But be warned, it may not always tell the ‘long’ truth, if you catch my drift!